Old 10-20-2018, 11:51 AM #1 (permalink)
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Default Without mum

So im here. Its been 10 days since mum died. Went to work this week. We did the 3 day memorial and then the 9 day memorial. House filled with people. Yet im missing mum. Especially at nights and mornings. The smiles the goodmornings her phonecalls to work. Strange i didnt miss it all this time she was bedridden. Till the end i was hoping for a miracle that didnt came. I didnt go out yet. Many offers from friends but i feel i want to take it easy. I cleaned the house. Her room. We do this winter cleaning wash the winter carpets change them. Generally trying to not remember. Changing the chanels we used to watch the shows. Not listening to music she loved. Trying to push the memories of how she got sick the doctors visits how she got worst. Her hopes dreams. Dont want to remember. My body hurts. My hands legs. My left leg is always in some ache. My calf my knee. I see dents in my whole body. Trying in general not to think anything. Trying to keep a distance from my feelings. Crying a lot. I dunno. Scared a lot. Dissapointed. Kinda resigned. Nit so angry anymore though.
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Old 10-20-2018, 01:38 PM #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Without mum

Take it easy. You'll cry. Expect a lot of interruptions in your head.


Your friends--real friends--will understand.


But do go out once in a while. A little distraction helps.
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Old 10-20-2018, 05:51 PM #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Without mum

Oh Nina, you were so close and you'll remember her like nobody else. Someday you'll hear her music again and it will bring a smile to your face, remembering the times when she was so very much alive. Don't expect too much of yourself or of your body. You need time to heal.
Big hugs!
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Old 10-20-2018, 07:14 PM #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Without mum

Nina we love you
Take time
See people you love
Cry
Listen to music
Take time off work if you can
See your doctor for your pain
See people you love
She will always be there
See people who love you
Loving vibes
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Old 10-21-2018, 08:50 AM #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Without mum

Hugs Nina. Praying for your comfort. No real advice as my time has not yet come.
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Old 10-21-2018, 02:49 PM #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Without mum

Nina, in time you will be happy to watch the shows and hear her music. Her likes and dislikes and the moments you shared will always be part of your life and memories. But now is the time to reclaim your own "likes and dislikes" as well. Don't stand away from your feelings. They have guided you this far.

Best,
Laurie
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Old 10-26-2018, 12:07 PM #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Without mum

I miss mum. I sometimes turn my head to her sit and talk forgeting she is not there. Huge house is empty. Her smile. How sweet she was. How much she went tbrou. I miss her dreadfully. Thays all.
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Old 10-26-2018, 12:11 PM #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Without mum

Big hugs to you, NIna. Give yourself time to feel all the feelings you are having. You will come out the other side of this and be an even stronger woman than you already are. You helped your mum tremendously through her journey, but now it is time to concentrate on you.

You were an asset to your mum and I am sure she was so grateful for the time you spent with her during her final days. Please know that you are strong and can get through anything; even this time that seems so challenging.
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