Old 01-10-2018, 06:54 AM #1 (permalink)
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Default 1st Day Back

Today is my first day back to work since my father passed and I am a mess. I don't know if I am ready for this. I miss the coccoon of safety of my home. Please pray that I make it through the day without too many people bombarding me with questions.
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Old 01-10-2018, 06:33 PM #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

I hope your day got better. I hope people didn't ask questions... They should know better. Hugs!
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Old 01-11-2018, 01:40 AM #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

If you don't want to talk, just smile. They will get the picture.

How did it go?
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Old 01-11-2018, 06:34 AM #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

It was hard....one co-worker saw me and burst into tears. That certainly didn't help as then I began to cry as well. Some had questions and a lot wanted to come up and hug me.
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Old 01-11-2018, 08:52 PM #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

I hope today was better?! I get get a few hugs when I returned. Some asked how I was doing but luckily most just said so sorry for your loss.

It will get better... I just finished my 3rd week. I had a much better week with less fatigue which is great.
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Old 01-12-2018, 11:54 AM #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

Yesterday and today were better. I am a teacher and some of my former students were very emotional about my dad passing. A lot of them have walked this path with me for years.....
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Old 01-12-2018, 12:25 PM #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

Praying for you! I struggle with me 34 year old brother having this disease and not looking forward to the grief that is to come. I hope you are able to get back into a routine here soon.
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Old 01-12-2018, 03:44 PM #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

Ctollar, in my case I didn't let anyone at work know except for my supervisor. I'm not sure if it was the right decision, but I wanted to keep my work separate from what I had experienced at home and as a place safe of reminders. But I have to admit it was strange because I was in a terrible mood for about four months and I didn't want to socialize with any of my coworkers and I would start crying at my desk. I think people knew at some level that something was wrong but nobody asked. I was lucky that my boss was understanding.

It does get better - hang in there. It is the "firsts" that are so unbearably painful but then the seconds, thirds, fourths etc. get progressively easier...
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Old 01-13-2018, 06:55 AM #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

Ctollar...you may have to get through the well meaning hugs and so sorrys at first but then others just move on with life. I know what you mean when you feel like your home is your haven. Here at home I don't have to fight that big painful lump in my throat when fighting back tears. Here at home I feel him all around me. This forum is also my haven as this is the only place that I know people understand. This is the place where I just quietly read for months so that I could be the best possible caregiver that I could be.
Hang in there...Manhattenite is right. The second, thirds and fourths do get easier. One day at a time. Hugs to you!
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Old 01-13-2018, 07:26 AM #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

Jlynn, You are so right..This place has become a safe place for me as well. While we were going through this awful disease, I spent months and months here researching anything I could to help my dad. I know it will get easier day by day. I also know he is no longer in pain. I don't miss the disease at all!! I do miss our daily texts. I find myself checking my phone half expecting/hoping for that text just asking me what I am up to....
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Old 01-14-2018, 01:39 PM #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: 1st Day Back

In many ways every day will get easier in there now. That first day, especially the first hour or two would have been so hard!!

Try to do whatever brings you the most comfort - you deserve that xx
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