I thought I was ready...

[lovedbygoldens]

I thought I was mentally prepared to come over to this section but now I am not so sure. I am so relieved my mom is no longer suffering but I don't think it has hit me yet that she is actually gone. That I can't text her, go visit, trim her nails or pluck her eyebrows. :'(

 

[Katie C]

I'm so sorry. I truly thought I was ready for things to "just be over." First words out of my mouth when he died? "I want him back!" I don't think we're ever truly ready but while it's never "ok" it does get easier

 

[Miss]

I felt exactly the same way, Katie.

 

[cervus]

It's still so early after your mother's passing. I don't know when things start to get easier and if or when we get used to our loved ones not being here. Don't rush things. This is all part of grieving, and grieve you must. Sometimes the fact that my husband is not here anymore hit's me so hard and still, at times, it feels surreal. I miss him more and more as time goes on. Thinking of you. Yasmin.

 

[brooksea]

We've been in the same place you. It will be very difficult for a while and you will be in a fog. I know it is hard to imagine things will get better for you, but they will. You will think less of the time as a cALS and more of the good times before ALS. In the meantime, take care of yourself. Anti-depressants and keeping busy are key.

 

[lovedbygoldens]

The parts I miss the most are before the ALS and truthfully before my dad got sick and passed away too. I wish my kids could have grown up with my parents active and alive in their lives. I don't so much feel like I am missing out, at least not yet. I wouldn't want either of them here as sick as they both were. But my kids are getting the raw deal here. I have great inlaws and they are the best gramma and papa two little boys could ask for but their my husband's mom and dad, not mine. Its different and so few understand it.

Thank you so much for your kind words and support. I will never stop missing my mom or my dad and its okay that it won't ever get eaiser or less difficult to think about we just learn to live with it. I miss them both every day with every breath. Now its just up to me to learn to live with it and to keep their memory alive for our boys.

 

[judyroyalglenn]

I am sorry for the loss of your dad and your mom. There are wonderful and caring people at both "ends" of the forum willing to support you through this difficult time. ~ Judy