Wondering what you've found...

[brooksea]

Today was a bright, sunshiny day with temps in the low 70's and breezy.

I felt like I was at a stalemate, as I could not bring myself to start the process of going through Don's clothing. But, I want to have a quilt made with some of his shirts that have special meaning. I also want to save some clothing for our son. He can just about wear some of his shirts and shorts!

I decided today was a beautiful, lovely day to sort through and think happy thoughts about how his things would be useful to others. Of course there are absolutely some items I cannot part with, but I think that is normal.

Anyway, as I was going through closet and drawers, it struck me as funny to find the elusive pair of Clic reading glasses hanging in the sleeve of a jacket! I just had to exclaim to him out loud, "I found your Clics!" Losing his Clics was a running joke, as they hung around his neck and he would always lose the darn things. Thinking I would find no surprises in his underwear drawer, I lifted the last pair out to find about $50 worth of change in the very back! One "coin" had the ten commandments stamped on it. Wonder what that was doing in there? :lol:

Oh, and this past week my dad helped me clean out the garage. Turns out my husband had so many tools that were duplicated. I mean some up to 5 or 6 times. I guess he would misplace them and just go buy another.

Have y'all found any surprises?

 

[Ms. Pie]

You've been very productive today CJ! Good for you. You doing okay? I'm trying to get things organized and given away before I may progress too much more just so Brad doesn't have too. It's amazing how much a person hangs on too over the years. Glad you're still talking to him Babe! He's most likely getting a kick out of the glasses you finally found!

 

[brooksea]

Marta, you are such a sweet thang! I'm doing fine and my son has found new friends that have lifted his spirits. He seems like a new person. Thank you for asking!

Don was a tool and a tech guy. I don't know what half the stuff is used for! Well, all that is for another day...

 

[Ms. Pie]

There ya go Toots. No need to do it all in one day.

 

[judyroyalglenn]

Those Clics you found will be a cherished item that you will keep to constantly remind you of him....and that is a good thing. I have several things I cherish of Moms. One thing I found was her diary when she was in high school. She dated Dad back then, and I have the date of their first kiss I also found her old checks that were boxed up. I found and kept checks she wrote when I was in kindergarten, a check to the family pediatrician, and one she wrote on my birthday. Dad also let me keep her bedroom slippers. I wore those things out!

Before she got sick, Mom and Dad had us draw straws to decided ahead of time who would get certain items. I have three sisters! I got Mom's engagement ring and wear it everyday; I always have a "piece" of Mom with me She also went through all of the family photo albums and took them a part and divided the photos up for us. She also saved Christmas cards she gave to Dad and Christmas cards we sent to others when we were young. She saved Mother’s Day cards I sent to her, cards from Dad, cards she sent to Dad for his birthday, and anniversary cards Mom and Dad gave to each other. You name it, I have it. I even have the cards my kids sent to Mom while she was sick. The cards are precious. She saved everything: Dad’s baby rattle, Dad’s Bible when he was young, Mom and Dad’s patches from their letter jackets in high school, and postcards from their honeymoon. I will always cherish all the things she so thoughtfully saved for us.

 

[Okie2]

It all sounds good CJ. So glad your son is getting around. You hang in there.

 

[Pandora]

I found things that just made me cry. I found a printed napkin that he has saved from our first date. I found ticket stubs to movies and races and special events we had gone to, I found a book I had given him our first christmas together, I also found an pair of lacy things that I lost the first time.... well i won't go there, but yeah he stole them. I didn't know he was so sentimental. All the birthday cards and little notes notes i had written over the years. Really heart wrenching stuff. I miss more then I can say. It has been 4 months, 6 days, 14 hours, 17 minutes. I know cuz I keep looking at the clock, I keep hopeing he is going to walk in the door, I just keep wanting him. I am not doing well, but I put on that fake smile, and keep on going, cuz time won't go back.

 

[Toto's Dorothy]

Cj, your phenomenal. And don't ever forget that.

 

[Jason's Dream]

Yes, I have found surprises as well.

A couple weeks ago, one of the best surprises was, finding his flash drive with his english portfolio on it. On it, among other things he had written, was an assignment he wrote about the day of our wedding, and watching me walk down the aisle and falling in love with me all over again. It was soo beautiful and precious. Another piece was his speech outline to talk about the day he became a father and holding his son for the first time. Absolutely priceless!

Also finding poems he had written, or in his wallet, finding movie ticket and concert stubs of events we went out on dates to.

 

[cervus]

I have been cleaning out our home (not Bob's things) but just purging. I haven't really found any surprises. I did find way too much software in Bob's office and just laughed at what a techie he was. He always was the first at work to have the latest computer, software, phones, etc. He and his boss (friends) always had this competition going and others would follow suit. I used one of Bob's winter jackets to go outside and found some scrunched up napkins and kleenex. He always had a little wad - not necessarily used, thankfully. That made me smile. I have given just a few of his things away, things that others could make some use of - not to strangers though but rather to people I know would really appreciate owning something that belonged to Bob. About three or four dress shirts, some outdoor wear, pj's to my daughter's fiancee, a couple of pairs of shoes too. I'm not planning on giving anything else away. I will hold on to everything I have left of Bob's for a long time still. I do miss him more everyday and just find that sometimes I'm just struck really hard, out of the blue, and break down. CJ, you're a brave woman. I think all of us are in our own ways. We've all been through so much and so many are still going through this either as PALS or CALS. I am truly in awe of all the courage this forum's members hold. Amazing people. Take care everybody. Yasmin

I will just add that one of our friends from the University where Bob worked is hosting a book club/party this Saturday in honour of Bob and our family. In Bob's last lecture he quoted from several books and the plan is for people to read all the books from which Bob quoted. The first one we picked was the last book Bob read from cover to cover. He had little yellow stickies in it and pencilled certain paragraphs. Reading the book and knowing it was his last book really upset me. Sort of still on the same topic, right?

 

[Katie C]

18 months later and we're about 2/3 of the way through the purging/cleaning process. So many things fell into disrepair before we ever had a diagnosis! Anyway the best find so far... before we sent the clothes to the funeral home I had Kevin go through all the pockets.. came up with about $40!

 

[cervus]

Wow! Maybe I should be hunting through underwear drawers and pockets more!