Hi jcmatch,
I am so sorry that your husband's diagnosis was confirmed. ALS does suck, it really does, but things do get better I promise! After my husband was diagnosed (12/16 days before his 58th birthday, bulbar onset) we bumbled through the holidays. We only told very close family/friends and did not tell our girls (14 & 11) until our second opinion in January. I, like you cried every single day at first, each time I would try to picture our future it was like the lights went out everything was dark. I cried even harder when I would pull in my driveway and see our camper and boat because they instantly reminded me of a future that we would never have. At some point, between then and now we started to adapt to our ever changing surroundings and started making modifications to our everyday lifestyle and house. We had safety bars installed in the bathrooms and now have a stair lift. The advice given on the sticky's is to anticipate what you will need ahead of time and to start the process of obtaining it, that is absolutely 100% true!! This was easier said that done, but it helps so much!
That black hole future feeling is still there, but it is nothing like it was a few months ago. My PALS is still working, he is incredibly fortunate to have a very understanding boss who allows him to work at home most of the time. We are getting our camper ready for the summer and a rail just arrived yesterday (gotta love Amazon Prime LOL) so he will be able to pull himself up the stairs of the camper. He walks with a walker, his ankles and hands are weak but he can still do many things with his hands that do not require too much strength.
To answer your speech question, I can only speak from experience. My PALS began losing his voice (raspy and slurred) last June, he can still be understood as long as he speaks slow and low. I usually have to have him repeat so I can understand him, but our girls can understand everything he says the first time it comes out of his mouth. It is truly amazing how adaptable children are! If he is able, there is a program called Model Talker (I think that is the name) which can bank his voice. We tried through our local university back in December, but at that time his voice was too weak to calibrate the system. If your husband can do it, I would definitely recommend it ASAP I miss his voice so much! It is pretty labor intensive, and requires many sessions to record his voice. Right now he is using an app called Predictability on his iPad (text to speech) which works pretty well (when he uses it). He still tries very hard to talk, but it is difficult to speak in conversation so I have really been encouraging him to use the app (he is a little on the stubborn side).
Please feel free to ask me anything, our situations sound very similar.
Jenn