My sweetheart

[adrivtham]

My sweetheart passed away last Friday and even though I know he is free now from this horrible illness I am inconsolable, and all I want to do is cry.
I met my beautiful husband online and we where inseparable. For us was second marriages, and he was a loving father for my children.
I am very short and he was tall and so handsome, I never got tired of looking at him. I used to joke saying that he was my husky and I was his Chihuahua.
We had a very simple live but we enjoyed to do things together. Sitting at the porch drinking coffee and watch the birds was our weekends mornings. The happiest chapter of my life was with him and I feel so lost now.
I tried so hard at the beginning of the illness thinking that we would beat this disease. I researched every day and got him all the medicines I could get but nothing worked.
The night he turned to the critical condition I was sleeping and I was hearing that he was kind of gasping for air but I was so tired that in my dream I was getting up and fixing his mask . This makes me so sad because I think that when I finally got up and check on him he must have suffering unable to wake me up.
He lasted 10 days in this condition were everyday they would tell me is his last day.
It was a torture, I was praying for mercy, but when he finally passed I wanted to cover him get him back but at the same time I hated what this illness has done to this beautiful man that I adored and needed to be free.
Hugs to all of you
Adriana

 

[Nikki J]

I am so very sorry for your loss but glad he is free and whole again.

You were a wonderful care partner and he was lucky to have you.

Peace and comfort

 

[ShiftKicker]

Adriana- I am so sorry. Your dedication and love for your husband shines through on every post you've made here. I grieve for you and hope there is some peace in knowing you did your absolute best to make sure your husband was cared for and not alone in his struggle. Again, I am so sorry.

 

[soonerwife]

Adriana, I am so so sorry for your loss. I could have written those same words about my relationship with my husband. I can not imagine what this feels like. May peace be with you and your family. I hope you can feel the hugs I am sending your way.

 

[Narrowminded]

Adriana, I am so very, very sorry for your loss. While you know he is free, it is still difficult. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I know and we all do that you loved him dearly and did your very best to care for him.

Hugs,

Sue

 

[KateEmerson]

Adriana, I am so sorry for your loss of your husband and for you having to watch him suffer. Know that he is no longer suffering and he knows how much you loved him and did for him. Kate

 

[lgelb]

Adriana,

I'm very sorry. You have nothing to regret but the vagaries of fate that brought this disease to your door. You were a great CALS and he was fortunate to have you "in sickness and in health." I know you will find peace and strength later, but we all cry. A lot. It is a pain beyond words, and also I think in part it is the unshed tears that we suppress while our PALS is with us. Your light will shine again.

Best,
Laurie

 

[affected]

Oh Adriana I am so sorry - the loss is so cruel and the deep sorrow feels endless.

I hope you can find peace, you were his very best friend and you did everything we, as CALS, have the power to do. We would heal every PALS if it were only possible.

Many hugs to you sister in pain xxxx

 

[Lkaibel]

Hugs, just hugs and thoughts for peace and comfort for you.

 

[texastc]

My sincere condolences Adriana. There are no words when you've been thru what we have. I wish peace for you and your family.

tc

 

[Manhattanite]

Hello Adriana, this breaks my heart - I followed your journey here from the beginning and we are all witnesses to how much you loved your husband and how you researched every possible option to make this illness easier on him. He was lucky to have you by his side and you were able to experience a type of love that not everyone gets to experience.

We surviving CALS have lived through a major trauma in our lives, we survived a war. The thought of how much our PALS suffered causes unimaginable pain. Only time will help heal the ravages of this awful disease.

Sending you all my love.

 

[pittsburghgal]

Adriana, I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. Your love and wonderful caring for him were so evident when reading your posts. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Sharon

 

[4tloml]

I'm so very sorry for your loss, Adriana. I hope you are somehow consoled to know he is free of this horrible disease, although I know your heart must feel shattered. Your care for him and what you've shared here make it clear you've experienced a kind of love not common in this world. Love is eternal...may that love sustain you and be a candle in your darkest of times.

 

[Erika]

I'm so sorry Adriana. I pray you will find comfort in memories of happy days and that in time, you'll heal and grow from all this. May he rest in peace.
Virtual hugs gong your way...
-Erika

 

[NothingButLove]

Adriana, I'm so sorry. I can feel how much you loved your husband just by reading your post. I'm hoping you find peace...

Rob