Penelope's Dad

[Penelope]

Re: Dad in hospital infection? Breathing a problem

Good morning.

Dad passed away 2 hours ago at 115am. I am typing now as I cannot sleep and am lying in a bed at my parents house trying to wrap my head around this.

He had seemed a little better the last two days we had given him a couple of pieces of good news he seemed keen to type things on his iPad to get across to us. I reassured him those things would be taken care of that we would do everything with Mum in mind and I left the room for the last time telling him I loved him.

He was using morphine 3 hourly in the end there was talk of putting in a driver in the next day or so.

Mum called to check on him 4 hours before he passed he had been a little agitated but once he had meds was resting comfortably.

They called 4 hours later to say he had passed peacefully.

Things I am glad for:-
He could communicate his wishes til the end was lucid comfortable and able to smile a little at good news about his kids/grandkids
He only spent two weeks of his life in hospital in reasonable comfort and not scared
He had marvellous caring staff attending him
That I could tell him I loved him and ease his fears for Mun
That he wasn't scared or sick in his last hours with a temp or infection and that he passed in his sleep
He was strong and stubborn and held onto to his dignity humour to the end and went with out additional intervention or suffering

My sadnesses are for my loss that I can't see him speak to
Him or kiss him again.

I hope his mates were waiting for him with a scotch and soda and a juicy steak and that wherever he is now he can walk talk breathe and be at peace

Thank you all for your comments and support you are an amazing bunch dealing with an awful illness and I salute you and appreciate the time you have given me.

I will be back in to check on you and keep updated.

Fly free Dad I love you forever

 

[affected]

Re: Dad in hospital infection? Breathing a problem

Wrapping you in a virtual hug Penelope. I'm so sorry for the loss of your dad, but as you have so beautifully written he he has flown free and is at peace in a better place eating steak and drinking scotch!

Now be really kind to yourself, you have been on a high alert the past couple of weeks in particular. Keep coming here as you work through this part of things.

What you wrote about your positives was great wisdom - there are many things to be glad for even in the midst of the despair of loss. I am also grateful for each thing on that list.

I didn't want to say earlier, but your dad is now the third of the aussies I've known this week or so, since you started this thread. The other 2 had very peaceful passings as well.

The statistics say that we average 2 deaths per day to MND here in Australia. I've not known anyone personally who has passed for months, now suddenly 3 in a week or so.

You are not alone, so keep posting. How do you think your mum is with it all? How old is she?

I hope you get a bit of a sleep in if you did get off to sleep. hugs

 

[Nikki J]

I am very sorry. May he fly free
Peace and comfort to you and your mom

 

[Barbie]

so very sorry for your loss. I love thinking of him with his mates, drinking and eating his favorites!

 

[Penelope]

THank you so much Tillie Nikki and Barbie

Managed a short fitful sleep now up and will head to the hospital in an hour and then the funeral home. I will keep
Coming in and reading stories and posting anything I can think of.

Dreading telling my kids especially my Dads loudly admitted favourite she is a soft little soul and will take this hard

 

[cheerleader]

Penelope, thank you for sharing the "end" of the journey- although it really doesn't end as long as he is still in your hearts. You are obviously a wise and caring daughter and finding happy thoughts with the sadness. Hugs to all of you. Donna

 

[vickim]

So very sorry for your loss. Wishing you and your family peace and comfort.

 

[Green Queen]

Thinking of you all Penelope. May many happy memories of your beloved dad always bring a smile to your face.
God bless, Janelle x

 

[Penelope]

It has been long full on day. The staff at the hospital were truly amazing they had carefully packed every single thing up so we didn't need to do a thing. We have already organised the service and wake. I have been like an energiser bunny I have even done the first version of a photo montage too scared to go lie down or cry in case I can't stop.

Telling the kids was hard I am trying to support them but am running on empty I am getting them involved in the service and told them if they want to write a letter or draw a picture for me to have placed in his casket they can do that

 

[anderkling]

Penelope, you have a beautiful soul! To be thankful for the little blessings in your situation is truly admirable. Thank-you for sharing all about your father and his passing. So glad for you and your family that it was peaceful, and that you were able to say your good-byes. But how great the loss. I understand all about running on nervous energy, planning for the funeral, afraid to stop because of fear of crying uncontrollably...my father died 7 months ago, and it was the same with me. May you have all you need to support your family during this time . . . and take time for yourself after the funeral to grieve, and catch your breath.
- Charlene

 

[Janie H]

Penelope you are a strong person, I'm sure you will take good care of your mum, I hope my kids will be as strong and caring as you are when my time comes.

Janie

 

[MaxEidswick]

>So very sorry for your loss. Wishing you and your family peace and comfort.

Ditto that!

 

[lgelb]

You have the right perspective, Penelope. Your dad was lucky to have you, and you and your mum will always be the better for the time you spent with him these last two weeks, and all through. Peace and strength to your family.

--Laurie

 

[skipper66]

I am so sorry for your loss Penelope. You are a wonderful daughter. Your dad is watching over you and he is so proud. Thank you for being there for him and your mom. I'm sure your love really helped him achieve peace in his final days. Hugs, Kim

 

[affected]

Honey sit down and cry! It may go on a while, but it will stop, then no fear it will even start again with as much force.

In some ways the energiser bunny is good, you can work some of it all off by working on stuff for the service and all. It's a kind of distraction therapy.

But you do need to let it out, this was a total rip off, crap and outright wrong thing to have happen to your dad and to you and your family. That's the plain truth! Many of us here are strong people, but believe me I HATE MND (Aussie version) with everything I can, and I still cry often just over a year since my Chris was taken.

I've learned to just take it, when I go suddenly low and feel the pain I have to let it happen and let it out and feel bleh. Sometimes I'm stunned when I feel so normal the next day as soon as I get up. It does stop, and it starts, and we never 'get over it', we learn to walk with a bit of a limp from our injury.

Hugs girl, wish I was closer to where you are.