karen1
New member
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2009
- Messages
- 5
- Reason
- Lost a loved one
- Country
- UK
- State
- Lancashire
- City
- Blackburn
I have just joined this chat site and think its fantastic that you can share your experiences, thoughts etc.
My dad was diagnosed with MND in Feb, he was a very healthy man he was young at heart and was loved by everyone, we watched our dad, grandad, partner, deteriorate as the weeks went by and were devastated at the changes through out these weeks, he couldnt speak, move any muscles at all, couldnt eat or drink, he had to communicate via a letter chart, which was so frustrating for himself and for us too, everytime i looked at him i filled up with tears and on occasions had to leave the room, as i didnt want him to see me cry, his grandsons were devastated, and the youngest one, age 14 couldnt even visit for approx 3 months, we had to tell him after a few months that it would be best to see his grandad as he would regret it if anything unexpected happened, so he did, but got very upset, this made my dad upset, and to see your dad cry is heartbreaking.
All i could think was.. why him, why this person who loved life, who went walking, who ate properly but i know it doesnt matter how much you look after yourself, if you get MND then you get it.
As the months went by he wanted to end it all, and he did mention it on occasions, to us and to his carers, but we just tried to stay strong, even though we knew he wouldnt have wanted to suffer, and he had also requested that if he was ever very ill..ie.. on a ventalator then he would want it switching off, as many people would request themselves.
At the beginning of Oct it was very bad the muscle he had had wasted away, he looked gaunt, fed up, a man really who you could tell didnt want to be here. One night his feeding tube got blocked and so was taken to hospital, just to get it unblocked, so a routine job really, but he wen down hill, he got pneaumonia, but it got better within hours so i was elated, to cut a long story short, he ended it himslf after i had gone home and he was in the room with Barbera, his partner and soul mate, he had come to the end and bless him he wanted 10 quality mins with her, he then closed his brain down him self, but his heart carried on beating, the nurse said it was the second time in 40 years that she ahd seen this happen, devastation doesnt cover it, i screamed so loudly when i found out, i just want my dad back the way he was, a lovely, happy giving funny man, he didnt deserve this, how scarey it must have been for him, i cant get my head round it all, even when i look at his photos its so wierd, like he could just pop round, anyway ive gone on enough, thanks for reading this, i will just go and mop my tears up.
KAREN:sad:
My dad was diagnosed with MND in Feb, he was a very healthy man he was young at heart and was loved by everyone, we watched our dad, grandad, partner, deteriorate as the weeks went by and were devastated at the changes through out these weeks, he couldnt speak, move any muscles at all, couldnt eat or drink, he had to communicate via a letter chart, which was so frustrating for himself and for us too, everytime i looked at him i filled up with tears and on occasions had to leave the room, as i didnt want him to see me cry, his grandsons were devastated, and the youngest one, age 14 couldnt even visit for approx 3 months, we had to tell him after a few months that it would be best to see his grandad as he would regret it if anything unexpected happened, so he did, but got very upset, this made my dad upset, and to see your dad cry is heartbreaking.
All i could think was.. why him, why this person who loved life, who went walking, who ate properly but i know it doesnt matter how much you look after yourself, if you get MND then you get it.
As the months went by he wanted to end it all, and he did mention it on occasions, to us and to his carers, but we just tried to stay strong, even though we knew he wouldnt have wanted to suffer, and he had also requested that if he was ever very ill..ie.. on a ventalator then he would want it switching off, as many people would request themselves.
At the beginning of Oct it was very bad the muscle he had had wasted away, he looked gaunt, fed up, a man really who you could tell didnt want to be here. One night his feeding tube got blocked and so was taken to hospital, just to get it unblocked, so a routine job really, but he wen down hill, he got pneaumonia, but it got better within hours so i was elated, to cut a long story short, he ended it himslf after i had gone home and he was in the room with Barbera, his partner and soul mate, he had come to the end and bless him he wanted 10 quality mins with her, he then closed his brain down him self, but his heart carried on beating, the nurse said it was the second time in 40 years that she ahd seen this happen, devastation doesnt cover it, i screamed so loudly when i found out, i just want my dad back the way he was, a lovely, happy giving funny man, he didnt deserve this, how scarey it must have been for him, i cant get my head round it all, even when i look at his photos its so wierd, like he could just pop round, anyway ive gone on enough, thanks for reading this, i will just go and mop my tears up.
KAREN:sad:
