How can I best support???

Anastasia · 09-13-2009, 08:52 AM

As Ed s appointment looms on the 16th, I am so filled with dread as this appointment has been brought forward as he is not managing mainly his terrible depression.Ed now is ready to ask a lot of questions and feels he is ready to deal with the info he gets , then he changes his mind and wants to block it all out. I am sure many can identify with this !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Any way , day by day and all that stuff, I guess.
I guess I am asking an impossible question, I just need a little advice re how to handle his initial re action as I fear it will be really traumatising. Cheers to all, Anastasia.

beverly rees · 09-13-2009, 09:58 AM

Hi Anastasia,
You might want to find a therapist that you could both go to before the visit. As my husband's caregiver, I go once a month to a therapist. It has been of great help to me. When we first got the diagnosis I was so overwhlemed and thought I needed to sell the house immediately. They are able to put things in perspective and help you live in the present along with making decisions to prepare for the future.

I hope that you get some good news on the 16th. Bev

shelleynshaggy · 09-13-2009, 08:28 PM

I agree with Bev. I saw a therapist also - weekly for the first month. Know I have enough of a grasp on things I just go back as I need to. I also found a counselor who dealt with geriatric conditions (funny since he's only 36) d/t Jim's dementia. Though Jim never met with her she helped me take a grasp of how to deal with him. Jim is not depressed because of his lack of understanding - however, see your PCP. He prescribed me an anti-depressent that I take daily and Xanax to take as needed. I use it for those mental-breakdown moments. Since you know the worse case scenerio - hopefully you will be able to hear what the doctors say after "the diagnosis."

I used the pre-diagnosis to research ALS so I wasn't entirely lost when I heard ALS. I also brought my mom to his appointment for an extra set of ears. Between the two of us I feel that we picked up and retained more information through the visit. I also "prepped" her for the visit by sending her any information I had on ALS so the inital shock would be less.

Good luck on the 16th.
Rachelle

Anastasia · 09-14-2009, 08:19 PM

Thank you for your suggestions Shelley. It all helps. Thanks also for your best wishes for the 16th. I wish you guys well also.
Thank you all for caring and sharing.

Anastasia · 09-14-2009, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beverly rees

Hi Anastasia,
You might want to find a therapist that you could both go to before the visit. As my husband's caregiver, I go once a month to a therapist. It has been of great help to me. When we first got the diagnosis I was so overwhlemed and thought I needed to sell the house immediately. They are able to put things in perspective and help you live in the present along with making decisions to prepare for the future.

I hope that you get some good news on the 16th. Bev

Thank you Bev. I wish you well on your journey also and have made two attempts to get to chat with a counsellor but each time some thing else has come up. Guess I need to prioritise and attend.Ed has been advised to seek help in this way also, but is set against it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Will persevere. Cheers and thanks again.