Emotional Lability insights - Page 4

hopingforcure · 11-09-2009, 10:50 PM

I agree, the sounds are just not fair. Like you said we just have to find comfort in are good mind. Ok yah that's it we have good minds... Is that good?

peter57 · 11-10-2009, 12:00 AM

Hi Colleen, thanks for asking

No flooding here, some around north of Sydney though.

We are currently in the middle of our hottest spell for November for ages.
Currently app 35 deg C (where Anastasia lives it a couple or 3 deg warmer so they will set new records too if it keeps up)

cheers (time for a Coopers)

peter

chefdeborah · 11-10-2009, 09:03 AM

Ida has arrived here in GA! It has rained all night and I guess we have had around 2" by now and it is still raining and the wind is relaly getting up! Well, I guess that is a good thing...all the leaves will be down! LOL!
deborah

GlenBrittle · 11-11-2009, 04:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by paleshia

yep, i often wonder why i sound so awful...i mean come on...can there be a little dignity here...a gentle cry, a normal laugh.....wow this disease sure does make you check your pride...way sooner than i thought i would have to

Yep , I checked my dignity at the door and forgot which door it was at.

I giggle like a retard (sorry to the challenged people , but you all know that sound). When in a crowd , yep , it attracts attention. {{oh shit they are all staring at me}}

Glen

chefdeborah · 11-11-2009, 12:35 PM

I try NOT to laugh! Sound like a braying jackass! And like you say...EVERYONE LOOKS AT YOU!

My husband is making an announcement at church Sunday that is really going to upset me and I don't know how to handle it. I don't know whether to be by his side and sit there, or to go out and not make a scene. I am really upset over this and don't know how to handle it. He has to do it, but I feel like it is all my fault and it is, because of this #%@#$(*@) disease! He is an elder in our church and he is stepping down because of ME. He feels like he needs to take what little time we have left to do the things we wanted to do during our life together. I understand what he is doing and love him for it.....but I just hate to be the reason for it.

deborah

deborah

joelc · 11-11-2009, 12:55 PM

............

GlenBrittle · 11-11-2009, 06:47 PM

Deborah,

He is not doing this because of you. He is doing it because he loves you.
There is a big difference. I would be there to be proud of him.

Don't over analyze everything. It a waste of time that could be used for something more enjoyable. That is experience talking right thar ya know.

Glen

tmasters · 11-11-2009, 07:58 PM

Glen, EXACTLY!

Deborah,

Look at it this way: Your husband has decided that he's going to spend what little time he has left on this earth to be with YOU! ...because YOU are his priority and not the congregants.

You should be so happy and proud. He loves you.

-Tom

BethU · 11-11-2009, 08:01 PM

With all due respects, in a situation like this, where a lability outburst is likely, I personally would prepare for it by making sure I have taken my meds or taken something to help handle the emotions beforehand. It may be very exhausting for you when members of the congregation surge around you later, expressing sympathy.

I know, I know ... we should experience the moment and he's doing this out of love ... but as someone who has been embarrassed and exhausted by EL "storms," I've learned that some situations are going to trigger something, and this sounds like a big trigger to me. And this is the topic of the thread.

Would your husband consider submitting a letter to the congregation that could be included in a church bulletin, or read by the minister ... anything to make it less stressful for you? Does it have to be done right now, when you have not gotten your EL under control? Could he wait a couple weeks? Clearly, his decision to make this big public announcement has already put you under pressure.

If I'm out of line, please forgive me. I'm just thinking what I would be feeling in your shoes.

Zaphoon · 11-11-2009, 08:35 PM

I like what Beth had to say on the matter!

I think it would be wisdom on your husband's part to step down without making a scene. He doesn't need to bring unwanted attention to you in a public setting.

This sort of thing can be done seemlessly; I know because I've done it myself. He can simply, quietly go to the leadership of the church and say, "I'm stepping down for personal reasons.". Nothing more need be said. He doesn't even have to say he's doing it for you. I think he should protect you by saying as little as possible.

I've stepped up and down in church settings and have done so without bringing undo attention to myself and family. No need to take a pulpit here and for who's glory?

Just my thoughts...

Zaphoon

paleshia · 11-11-2009, 08:43 PM

i agree about making some adjustments to avoid the almost certain emotional breakdown. My husband is an elder in our church too, and as timing would have it, his 3 year term on session ends in Dec. He will not serve on the team again next year, for obvious reasons. I have him make calls that I don't think I will get through, and stuff like that. I also think you have the right to not be there for the anouncement if he does want to do it publicly. We are working on just how public our journey will be too, and it has to be on your time Deborah.....that's between you and God. If your husband wants to be more public about it and you're not ready, that is okay too.

this is one tough journey, huh?

GlenBrittle · 11-11-2009, 08:48 PM

Beth & Zaph , I can also see your points of view. I hope we are not adding to her anxiety about it.

In the end Deborah , having been shown different viewpoints to the situation , Just do WHAT YOU FEEL IS RIGHT FOR YOU.

What do your instincts say ? Follow that.

Glen

Zaphoon · 11-11-2009, 08:55 PM

Nicely put, Glen!

I don't mean to muddy the waters if my 2 cents wind up doing that.

Zaphoon

paleshia · 11-11-2009, 08:56 PM

yeah sorry deborah, we don't want it to be more stressful for you...i will just pray for your strenghth and peace; whatever you decide.....

chefdeborah · 11-12-2009, 09:22 AM

He announced he was doing this on the day that we got our diagnosis...in the middle of our meal at Kentucky Fried Chicken. I nearly died! I know he didn't mean anything by it, but he just had to tell me he had already told the other elders he was thinking about it and now he had made up his mind. He had already told me he was thinking about it and I had asked him NOT to do it. But, I understand what he is doing. I will just take some Xanax and go through it. So what if I sound like a braying jackass in church...might as well get it over with. He has been a great elder and I know it is hurting him as well as me. I think I am making this all about me and not about what he feels too.

I appreciate all your different ideas about how to handle this. I don't know if I will make it through this or not..I will let you know.

thanks for the love and prayers!
deborah