Hi, Savoring ... I'm so sorry for your husband's diagnosis. He is blessed to have you there to support him.
My lability is quite extreme ... I think most PALS experience much milder outbursts ... but I have read posts about the subject from people who have my type, so it's not unheard of.
The main thing to remember is that the outbursts are uncontrollable. You can't stop them. They have to wind down by themselves. For the PALS, they are very embarrasing, because they are usually WAY out of proportion to the "cause" ... a news story about an abandoned pet can trigger 15 minutes of sobbing, or a casual courtesy from a stranger can cause you to burst into tears. Often they are additionally embarrasing because they are so out of place ... uncontrollable laughter at a funeral for example.
About a year after my bulbar symptoms started, my EL appeared full-blown. (I think actually that I had episodes of EL ... anger and irritation ... before any other
ALS symptoms appeared, but pinpointing the "beginning" of
ALS is very difficult.) The first time it happened with weeping, I was on the phone with my niece. I was upset about a medical procedure my husband had coming up, and my niece offered to accompany us, and I broke into huge sobs and wailing because of the kindness of her offer. It was so embarrassing, as I couldn't stop ... and it was nothing like any "crying" I had ever done. The noises I made were incredible. I know other PALS have experienced this kind of loud outburst, but not all do.
Unexpected kindness, or anything emotional to do with animals will set me off. What is so distressing is that with the weeping especially, but anger, too, my mind is completely disconnected from the emotions I'm expressing. So during an episode, I use my LightWriter to tell people I'm around that this has nothing to do with them, or the situation, it is
ALS in action. When I type that out, I am still usually crying and screaming. It's like having a seizure ... your body is doing something you can't stop, and your mind is horrified at the noises you're making.
I'd only begun to have laughing episodes when I got on lability meds, but I experienced the same thing there ... loud, uncontrollable snickering and whinnying unlike normal laughter. Fortunately, the lability meds have controlled it completely.
I think a lot more PALS have this than recognize it. Anger and irritability with caregivers especially is often a sign. It is so hard on the caregivers, who usually are devoting their lives to care for their PALS, and to feel that nothing they can do will satisfy their PALS is very hard to bear.
Anyway, the good news is that it CAN be controlled with medication. I am on a med that is still in trial (Zenvia), which has benefits for the whole bulbar region of the brain. Anti-depressants can control this, also. When I was without lability meds, I would take a Valium before seeing people I love, which I knew might trigger an outburst of weeping. I don't like Valium, but it helped to control it.
My advice to any PALS who is finding themselves short-tempered with their caregivers or family members: get help to get control. This is a normal symptom of
ALS, and treating it will increase your quality of life enormously. It's not fair to our family members to subject them to inappropriate anger when they are carrying such extraordinary burdens just with our physical and emotional care.
Savoring ... nothing you are doing is contributing to your husband's irritation, and there is nothing you can do to reduce his irritation and anger. It is a symptom of
ALS. Hopefully, your husband can come to realize that his reactions are way out of line; maybe his neuro can make it clear to him. Simple medication can bring him back to his "real" self, with normal and appropriate emotions, and it will make it much easier for him (and those around him) to cope with the disease.
Blessings to you both.
Emotional lability -- how does it start? 
