I don't know whether to feel sad or glad

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swalker

Very helpful member
Joined
Dec 11, 2014
Messages
1,580
Reason
DX MND
Diagnosis
07/2014
Country
US
State
CO
City
Vail
I received a letter from the social security folks today saying I was approved for disability. I submitted the initial paperwork 27 days ago.

While I am pleased as punch to have made it through the process, it is really distressing to be deemed disabled enough and to have poor enough prospects to have made it through the process so quickly.

So, I sit here with mixed emotions. Glad that SSDI approval it is behind me, but reminded of the direction things are going.

Steve
 
Day at a time, Steve. This one was good. Tomorrow will be what it is.
 
There are just a ton of lines you have to cross with this disease. And each one makes it seem more real. Bummer doesn't seem to cut it.............
Vincent
 
I'm sorry to agree with Atsugi and Vincent. However, through it all recognize God's presence as He will be there every step of the way...
 
I am sorry. Sort of. I know the feeling of this is great it will help me but....
 
>Tomorrow will be what it is.

gospel!
 
I had my worst night after filling out all the SSDI forms. It felt so final and hopeless. However it's sure nice to get the monthly check now, though.
 
Thank you for all the support! I kind of needed it after the SSDI stuff.

Today was indeed a better day. We drove to Denver (about 100 miles) to pick up the wheelchair van, which was having adjustments made to the ez lock. We bought the van used and the ez lock needed to be moved to accommodate my wheelchair. It was a pleasant drive down and I was able to drive the van home. We looked at beautiful mountain scenery the whole way, and that always does much to restore my spirits.

Atsugi: Yep, day at a time has been and continues to be my motto. I will get the most out of each day.

Vincent: Yes, there are many lines to cross and the SSDI thing was just one. The wheelchair, the van, stopping work, private disability, etc. I know there are more coming up.

Kingaustin: Knowing that god is with me at every step and would never place me on a path I could not endure gives me great peace. I rely on that daily. I reflect on the book of Job often.

Nikki and Max: You made me smile:)

Azgirl: I thought filling out the paperwork was a bummer. The trip to the social security office to show required documentation was a downer. But neither compared to getting approved so quickly. I keep hoping someone will tell me this is not serious enough to justify disability. Denial is a wonderful thing sometimes:)

The sadness about being approved for SSDI is behind me. I choose to feel glad about SSDI and all the other blessings I have. Life really is wonderful, even when you get thrown a curve ball.

Steve
 
Now that you have the van, you can go anywhere you wish to go. Do you have a trip in mind?
 
Now that we have the van, we have several trips planned.

Early April, we head to the Grand Canyon for almost a week. I have lived in Flagstaff, AZ for about 8 years in two different stints. We have spent wonderful days and nights at the canyon. For one of our anniversaries, we did a day hike on the South Kaibab Trail from the rim to the river and back. The only place we could find still open to eat afterward was the McDonalds at Tusyan. We both agree that it is our most memorable anniversary meal, though perhaps not our best. I won't be doing any trails into the canyon this time, but there are miles of wheelchair accessible trails along the rim. We will be camping, which will be a bit of a challenge for me. My wife had threatened homicide if I try to help set up the tent. If I don't report back, you will know what happened:)

In the middle of May we go to Yellowstone for two weeks. My wife had prevailed, and we will be staying at the Old Faithful Inn rather than camping. I love Yellowstone and typically visit it 3 times a year. There are many wheelchair accessible trails and I plan to get the most out of them. I also like wildlife photography and hope to be able to get my wife to set up my tripod with my big wildlife lens so I can try to get a few shots.

In July, we return to Yellowstone with my two sisters for a week. We will camp, and I have again been threatened with homicide from 3 separate females if I try to help set up camp. The folks at Yellowstone have been great about helping set up accommodations, including charging the wheelchair while we camp.

In September, we return to Yellowstone for 2 weeks in the Old Faithful Inn. I look forward to hearing the elk bugle and seeing the plump bears as they prepare for hibernation.

In between, we plan to go to Texas to visit my siblings and to make various trips to Rocky Mountain National Park.

Those are the plans. The reality may differ based on my condition.

Steve
 
Steve, so good to see you are making the most out of your time- everyone needs to live like that! Have fun (and listen to those smart ladies! Conserve your energy for the fun stuff!
 
That is wonderful. I was hoping you were going to Yellowstone. I remember you commenting how much you loved it. We are currently in Nashville with our old van waiting to get out wheelchair van. I can't wait. I think things will be easier! Happy travels.
 
What a wonderful set of plans and now you have the van to make it possible!

Your attitude is wonderful and you should indeed do all you can while you can and make the most of each one. Instead of regretting you can't hike now, you have plans for all the things accessible and I'm sure your wife will set up the tripod, unless it's to punish you for trying to set up camp anyway ... ;)
 
Steve I am so jealous of your trips ! I have only been to Yellowstone once and was blown away by it! we camped for a bout a week. I would have loved to stay at the old faithful inn it is so beautiful!

Never been to the grand canyon--that was a trip that was planned and not taken because of other things that happened in our life. There is another park in Utah that I wanted to go to--can't remember it's name though. sounded so lovely

I am so glad you are doing all these great trips! good for you
 
Barbie we made it to the grand canyon but have had two trips planned to Utah and surrounding area. Have one planned for Yellowstone, Utah, and wherever else steve wants to head this July. Just not sure we will make it.
 
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