Rainbow5
Member
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2013
- Messages
- 12
- Reason
- Learn about ALS
- Country
- US
- State
- Dc
- City
- Washington
Hi all,
Thank you for reading this - it means a great deal to know that folks are out there willing to provide support.
This is not my first time in life with health issues. I have successfully experienced, with purposeful resiliance -epilepsy (since 12, well controlled) a fall down the stairs, broken back, aspiration pneumonia, breast cancer (double mastectomy), two children with serious chronic health problems (the biggest challenge of them all)...
I'm happy to report, and extremely thankful (!) that I am currently able to work full time, take care of my kids and my wonderful, wonderful dog (single Mom) and to enjoy "the little things"...
But...
I am now going through a full workup for MS. And the other "stuff" did not make me "mad" - I was anxious, scared, and swore that none of the "stuff" would ever get the best of me. I still struggle with my one child's serious chronic health issue (anorexia) - it is terrifying.
Why now do I/my kids need to go through another "thing"? That is of course a rhetorical question, and I guess that I am just venting but sure feel the need to do so.
My sibling has MS; he was diagnosed 5 years ago. He has had bad periods, and yucky medicines, but overall has been very lucky in terms of his symptoms.
I am finally getting tested... I have resisted it thinking that it would not make a difference. But after tripping, falling, pain, and now serious walking and balance issues, I went to my internist who sent me to a neurologist (I have seen neurologists all my darn life with the seizure disorder) to do a workup.
Saw her last week; she is a calm, nice, practical woman and I am glad to have met her. She was very forthright. She said, after having me do all of the "tests" that my symptoms are not normal at all. I have had years of what I have called "my leg pain" - diagnoseded with 'restless leg', fibro., etc. but this is now of a different intensity and quality. I have fallen/tripped multiple times. I am "wobbly" for lack of a better term, feel like I am going to fall, cannot walk without lurching... am in pain more often than not (it used to be that I would have periods without any problems); cannot walk up or down stairs without extreme efforts - avoid curbs, etc.
I was a runner, fit, could bench press my own weight.. and now am unwell.
She has ordered bloodwork up for a number of things (maybe it is something like a vitamin deficiency), an MRI of my brain, cerv., thoracic, lumbar with contrast and an EMG.
So Im not blind to what may or may not be coming. But just MAD.
I don't know what else to say; I don't like to complain. I don't want to tell my family because of my brother.
I did say something to both kids (teens) - as I learned a lesson in the past. When I found out I had breast cancer, I did not tell them until I needed a full mastectomy. And they felt betrayed/that I had kept a secret. so I just said, "You know I have had my "leg pain", and that I have asked you to help me with things a lot more lately so I saw a doctor and I am going to have some tests". They asked "for what", and I said, it could be something very easy to deal with, like nothing (!) or it could be something that we will just deal with, as we have done in the past. My daughter, who worried that I would die from the breast cancer, said "Will this make you die?" and I said no, I truly don't think so - we will figure this out.
Enough writing - if you have read this thank you...I just don't really want to deal with this - not to whine, just to say "Darn it all!".
Thank you for reading this - it means a great deal to know that folks are out there willing to provide support.
This is not my first time in life with health issues. I have successfully experienced, with purposeful resiliance -epilepsy (since 12, well controlled) a fall down the stairs, broken back, aspiration pneumonia, breast cancer (double mastectomy), two children with serious chronic health problems (the biggest challenge of them all)...
I'm happy to report, and extremely thankful (!) that I am currently able to work full time, take care of my kids and my wonderful, wonderful dog (single Mom) and to enjoy "the little things"...
But...
I am now going through a full workup for MS. And the other "stuff" did not make me "mad" - I was anxious, scared, and swore that none of the "stuff" would ever get the best of me. I still struggle with my one child's serious chronic health issue (anorexia) - it is terrifying.
Why now do I/my kids need to go through another "thing"? That is of course a rhetorical question, and I guess that I am just venting but sure feel the need to do so.
My sibling has MS; he was diagnosed 5 years ago. He has had bad periods, and yucky medicines, but overall has been very lucky in terms of his symptoms.
I am finally getting tested... I have resisted it thinking that it would not make a difference. But after tripping, falling, pain, and now serious walking and balance issues, I went to my internist who sent me to a neurologist (I have seen neurologists all my darn life with the seizure disorder) to do a workup.
Saw her last week; she is a calm, nice, practical woman and I am glad to have met her. She was very forthright. She said, after having me do all of the "tests" that my symptoms are not normal at all. I have had years of what I have called "my leg pain" - diagnoseded with 'restless leg', fibro., etc. but this is now of a different intensity and quality. I have fallen/tripped multiple times. I am "wobbly" for lack of a better term, feel like I am going to fall, cannot walk without lurching... am in pain more often than not (it used to be that I would have periods without any problems); cannot walk up or down stairs without extreme efforts - avoid curbs, etc.
I was a runner, fit, could bench press my own weight.. and now am unwell.
She has ordered bloodwork up for a number of things (maybe it is something like a vitamin deficiency), an MRI of my brain, cerv., thoracic, lumbar with contrast and an EMG.
So Im not blind to what may or may not be coming. But just MAD.
I don't know what else to say; I don't like to complain. I don't want to tell my family because of my brother.
I did say something to both kids (teens) - as I learned a lesson in the past. When I found out I had breast cancer, I did not tell them until I needed a full mastectomy. And they felt betrayed/that I had kept a secret. so I just said, "You know I have had my "leg pain", and that I have asked you to help me with things a lot more lately so I saw a doctor and I am going to have some tests". They asked "for what", and I said, it could be something very easy to deal with, like nothing (!) or it could be something that we will just deal with, as we have done in the past. My daughter, who worried that I would die from the breast cancer, said "Will this make you die?" and I said no, I truly don't think so - we will figure this out.
Enough writing - if you have read this thank you...I just don't really want to deal with this - not to whine, just to say "Darn it all!".