tbuchanan13
Member
- Joined
- Feb 29, 2012
- Messages
- 25
- Reason
- Loved one DX
- Country
- US
- State
- Indiana
- City
- Brownsburg
This is my first post. My dad was diagnosed with ALS last year. We first starting noticing that something was not quite right when he was losing he awesome muscle tone in his legs. We have always said that my calf muscles are just like my dad's...nice, toned...muscular. Now...his are non-existant! What kind of disease is this? Why does it have to happen to him? Its very scary to see him decline so fast...to see your once strong dad...wither away to hardly nothing..barely able to walk, falling...having to lift his water glass with two hands...not able to button his buttons.....not able to do yard work...speech is starting to go, becoming more slurred each time I speak with him. The choking is scary too! Talking about hoyer lifts and wheelchairs? Seriously? He is a Vetenam Vet! Told this is Service Related ALS! What did we do to our people? What are we doing to our people? Im getting married in August of this year... what if he cannot walk at all? What if he cannot talk at all? What if he is on a breathing machine at that time? Worse yet...what if he dies? DAMN this Disease? Im so mad at it...I give it to God to take away my dislike for this disease....I do not understand why, but only he knows the reasons. Perhaps....if for only the sole purpose of bringing my dad to know him! I dont know and will never know for now. Its like I do not know what to think about it anymore? How to feel? I still joke with him and love on him like he does not have it....but its killing me inside to see him go through this. I really dislike the fact that you remain cognative...it seems it would be so much easier if you didnt know what was going on? Today my heart is hurting and perhaps if I can just write...get it out...YELL! I know my mom is having a hard time with all of this, but she is trying to be so strong....for everyone! I know when I get married...he will be there...if we have to carry him...or he is there in spirit! Im sorry if this seems all over the place...my mind is racing. Thank you for reading!