for new and old pals fun needs to be apart of life

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smwelder

Distinguished member
Joined
Dec 7, 2010
Messages
186
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
11/2010
Country
US
State
CALIFORNIA
City
san diego
Having survived a stroke 14 years ago that left me partly paralyzed on my left side has taught me patience, as well prepared me for my new disability. Although I now have this unbeatable sickness I’ve learned there’s nothing I can do to change the fact that I’m sick.. Like any disability in the beginning there’s much to learn. Not only does the disability change your life it changes those around you too. At least with ALS to a curtain aspect your mind is unaffected. We still have the ability to problem solve on our own or with the help of others. As an alcoholic has to learn how to live with out drinking he or she must learn to cope with not be able to drink like others. As alcoholic person struggles with not being like others, pals struggles with the inability to live like others. Part of the struggle involves how we have fun. Learning to have fun in this new body is as important as eating. Not only do we need to feed our body we need to feed our mind. Having fun in life is so important, if there’s no fun in life you starve in an emotional aspect. Talk about the anger, cry, get mad and allow yourself to greave don’t dwell on what’s to come just prepare for it. Do the things you like while you still can and educate yourself how you can do other things. This forum is just the place to ask others how to do things. Remember pals and cals we are never alone on this journey, have fun in life because with out it life is lifeless. :grin:
 
You've said a lot and made a great point... once we decide to find our new ways to live with the disease, it just takes a little time for it to play out into new interests. At least that was my experience. In the course of an average life there are some disappointments, and rearranged expectations. The problem is in not being willing to accept what can't be changed or... the disease progresses so quickly there is literally no time for doing anything but react to its demands. Yours is an excellent post. Thank you!

Ann
 
You are right - so very right. I consider this just another "stage" of life and since there is no going back I need to adapt and find new interests or hobbies that bring joy. Thanks for the post!
 
I wish my husband could see things this way, he is cutting people out of his life, and well just nothing makes him happy anymore. Not even me.
 
hi joni., i too was where your husband is. my stuberness and being mad at the world took me over. because i let it run my behavior it was hard to admitt thing like fear and guilt ect. the longer i portrayed the angry man the harder it was for me to just let it all out in a proper manner. it took a friend coaxing me with questions like do i feel scard am i mad how do i feel as she did this it felt easier for me to let the wall down and it all came out. male ego is a mans worst enemy. in cases like this letting him know its ok to feel sad scared, pain and loss of control.
 
I know that Bruce, my husband has always taken care of everyone else, so he is not a big talker. I just want him to feel like he can talk to me and have some joy.
 
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