Old 11-05-2010, 08:35 PM #1 (permalink)
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Unhappy Having trouble

My brother was diagnosed with ALS recently. He has a progressive type.

Anyway I am having a rough time dealing with this. I am very close to him and he has such a great outlook and I want to support him and his family.

Anyway, It is extremely hard for me to deal with. I lost my mom in 2002 dad in 2005 I am not ready to lose my brother. How do I stay positive and help him and his family. I love them all with my heart!
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Old 11-05-2010, 08:51 PM #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Having trouble

I'm really sorry about the losses of both of your parents and now your brother's diagnosis. Your desire to support him is wonderful and is very important--and will be so appreciated by all of his family. I do wonder if you may need to talk with a doctor about dealing with so much, and see if you would benefit from medication and/or counseling. I also wonder if you have friends you can talk with openly about this, as you do seem to need some support yourself. Do you live near your brother? Are you able to speak frankly with him and your sister-in-law? I ask because while I know what helped me, it isn't necessarily what others might want. I wanted open discussion from the beginning.

There's a Christian thread on the PALS/MND section where you're welcome to come. I've found my relationship with the Lord to make all the difference. You are in my prayers... your brother is very fortunate to have you!
Ann
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Old 11-05-2010, 08:54 PM #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Having trouble

I'm sorry for the news but you don't know how fast he really will progress! He could go on for many many years.
You need to stay positive for him and youself. You need to enjoy everyday that you all have together!
Make sure he's eating right, exercising to keep active and make sure he's taking vitamis, fish oil & any
meds the Dr's are perscribing! He's here now so look at everyday as a gift! That is how my family deals with me!
Staying hopeful goes a longgggggg way! You can do it! He's lucky to have as a caring Sis!
Take Care
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Old 11-06-2010, 12:56 AM #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Having trouble

My brother also has this disease. It has been the toughest year and a half of my life. As cliched as it sounds you really just have to deal with each day as it comes. Some days are easier to deal with than others. My brother also has an amazing attitude - if you need to talk to someone who understands I am here
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Old 11-06-2010, 07:53 PM #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Having trouble

Viktor Frankl wrote a book that really helped me. He is a holocaust survivor and this book gave me hope when I was completely in the dumps. Also, rent some hilarious videos and make a steady diet of it. It will not make the grief go away but it will give you a break for the duration of the video. I always find funny videos online and laugh until I am crying. Also, I have one friend who I can talk to about anything and she just listens without offering her opinion. I don't see her often as she has three children with autism but that's another thing that keeps me above water..... You're in my prayers, hugs!
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Old 11-07-2010, 12:17 AM #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Having trouble

The week after Glen died, and the week after my mom died.. we found LOTS of really funny video clips on YouTube that we would watch over and over. ALS can quickly overwhelm both PALS and family members. Taking breaks to remember there are still fun and funny things in life can literally be life saving!
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Old 11-07-2010, 01:24 AM #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Having trouble

it is hard dealing with it some days you feel for him and others for your loss , as to how to stay together without falling apart i think the hardest part is accepting it and accepting their is nothing you can do to save him then it gets a little better to deal ... you and his family can laugh and cry together , that's when staying positive starts to come in even thou i don't think that is quite the word for it , and you will be suprised how well you can hold up in front of him and how it becomes easy to do let him know you will be there for him and his family ... wishing you the best .... hugs
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