Old 10-07-2017, 01:16 PM #181 (permalink)
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Default Re: Overwhelmed

Buckhorn, I think that is partly what makes it so hard. Cliff has ALWAYS been such a thoughtful person. So for him to be so different, it's hard to not be hurt by it.

I told him that I was hurt by him wanting to see the sunrise with her. I told him that I wish he wanted to spend time with me... I don't think it is good to just bottle those feelings up and choke them down. I believe this causes resentment that I definitely don't want to have.

He played some music for me. A very sweet song about how easy it is to love me. We watched the first half of the OU game together.

I have been hoping that now that I have more time, I would be able to make some memories with him. Music is his #1 thing that he loves so hopefully we will be able to connect through music.

I hadn't thought about why he is connecting with others. Nikki may be right, I can't imagine what it is like for him to have this disease.

It still hurts that I can't be that person for him I want him to have friends but I also want to continue being his person. I have been doing that for 22 years and I am not ready to give that up.

I am so thankful for this forum. It gives me a place that I can be open and honest and get other perspectives from others that are on the other side of this monster. I would be completely lost without all of you!
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Old 10-07-2017, 02:45 PM #182 (permalink)
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Wow there have been some beautiful and deeply thoughtful replies here sooner!

I think it helps to step back and consider other reasons besides 'he doesn't want me for those things'.
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Old 10-07-2017, 07:47 PM #183 (permalink)
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Absolutely, it does help to hear other perspectives.

I think it also helped to let him know how I was feeling. He came out on the back porch with DD and the grand kids today. He hasn't done that in months.

Below is the sweet song he says is for me. Such sweet words.

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Old 10-07-2017, 11:38 PM #184 (permalink)
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Default Re: Overwhelmed

Beautiful song & words Sooner. I'm glad he shared that with you, along with time spent on the porch with your daughter & grandkids. I hope this helps affirm his love for you. He is still trying, and your comments to him did not fall on deaf ears.
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Old 10-08-2017, 05:19 AM #185 (permalink)
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wow what words, I hope you can keep that song in your mind every time things get hard!
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Old 10-08-2017, 09:17 AM #186 (permalink)
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It really does make a huge difference to know someone cares... He used to tell me "it's the little things". He is right about that. One little song or a "good morning baby" text that I received this morning" makes all the difference.

Knowing that I am losing my PALS to ALS and caring for him is the hardest thing I have been through in my life thus far. Little things mean soooo much!

Thanks for listening to the song!
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Old 10-08-2017, 12:38 PM #187 (permalink)
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Wow Sooner, That would absolutley make my day! What a sweet man.

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Old 10-08-2017, 12:50 PM #188 (permalink)
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It did Sue! It is so amazing what a kind gesture will do for your mood.

I have done the dishes, laundry, beds, took care of Cliff, got food out to cook for my son's birthday, posted the rent house on social media... Now I am waiting for one of our kids to get here so I can go do a little work at the rent house and take some more pictures.

He has always been such a thoughtful caring husband. I so love seeing that side peek out.
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Old 10-08-2017, 01:40 PM #189 (permalink)
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So true - it gives meaning to what you are doing when you receive that acknowledgement of love back. I hope he sees what this has done for you and realises he can impact on the quality of life for both of you in very real ways still!
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Old 10-08-2017, 10:25 PM #190 (permalink)
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Today was a pretty good day. It is my DS's 27th birthday. So all the kids came over and brought all the grand kids. I cooked chicken fried steak, potatoes and gravy, corn on the cob and biscuits. Also made my DS's favorite pineapple upside down cake.

I love having all our loves in one house. The kids had fun playing.

My DD gave her dad a haircut and shave which he was super happy about.

I have had 3 or 4 people interested in the rent house. One of them is the parent's of Cliff's writer friend. She is gonna look again tomorrow with her uncle. If all goes well, they have the cash so just update the abstract and it will be a done deal. I am praying that this time it happens...

It's 10:30 here, I must get my butt in bed...
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Old 10-09-2017, 07:46 AM #191 (permalink)
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Sooner what a wonderful day for you yesterday. All the family together, what a blessing. Praying the house sells. That would certainly take a load off of your mind.

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Old 10-09-2017, 02:49 PM #192 (permalink)
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How lovely your day sounded - all that family and love around you!

Hoping that house sells off fast so that you have one big thing less on your plate!
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Old 10-09-2017, 08:09 PM #193 (permalink)
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I got a lot accomplished today at home... Even not working, I still can't seem to get it all done. It's no wonder I was so overwhelmed.

I went to the rent house and swept and wiped some things down before the writer friend's mom came and looked again. Another family was supposed to look this evening but I never heard anything. Writer friend's mom is going to talk with her husband tonight that is out of state working and hopefully I will know something tomorrow?!

I have an eye appt tomorrow at 2:30. DD is going to stay with Cliff while I go. I really want to get a pedicure. I should have gone when the kids were here this afternoon but I was waiting on the guy to call to see the house. Oh well, maybe tomorrow or later on in the week.
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Old 10-09-2017, 08:10 PM #194 (permalink)
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I got a lot accomplished today at home... Even not working, I still can't seem to get it all done. It's no wonder I was so overwhelmed.

I went to the rent house and swept and wiped some things down before the writer friend's mom came and looked again. Another family was supposed to look this evening but I never heard anything. Writer friend's mom is going to talk with her husband tonight that is out of state working and hopefully I will know something tomorrow?!

I have an eye appt tomorrow at 2:30. DD is going to stay with Cliff while I go. I really want to get a pedicure. I should have gone when the kids were here this afternoon but I was waiting on the guy to call to see the house. Oh well, maybe tomorrow or later on in the week.
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Old 10-09-2017, 09:25 PM #195 (permalink)
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Sooner I'm crossing fingers on the house. Do try to squeeze in a pedi after the eye appt. it will feel so good.

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