It was so nice knowing that you were all with me Tuesday. The last two days have been rough.
We didn't get home from clinic until 8, then dinner and bedtime rituals, then Heidi was so ticked about being in the house all day (my imagination) that she rolled in something very smelly when she got out and so I had to bathe her.
Most things were "ok", but the pulmonologist did order an overnight oximeter study in order to see if falling o2 levels are waking Matt up every couple of hours. Oh, and him falling asleep while driveing the chair and winding up with a turned over chair had something to do with that order also. The equipment will be brought to the house, along with the cough assist and portable suction. His cough is "good", but everyone agreed it's time to have it on hand. The suction wasn't mentioned until the social worker read through the list of orders at the end. I guess it just goes hand in hand with the cough assist being "on hand". I agree that it's time, and I am glad they felt as I did, but it's still a downer.
Mostly the fact that my darling kept telling everyone he spoke to that his life is limited to a one-mile stretch of road where he walks the dog, the only time he's alone, and to watching TV--well, that tore at my heart.
So, I was just beat Tuesday. Too beat to pull things together for my quilting class on Wednesday. I tried getting up early, but overslept. I was rushing around trying to get out on time and was still late. The class went well, but I had a one hour break before my hair appointment (Wednesday the aide is here all day). I drove home hoping for a bite to eat (no breakfast), only to see a pickup truck with the rescue squad sticker in the driveway. Matt was on the ground again, at a scarey angle, with blankets over him and a pillow under his head. The aide had tried to call me, but I missed it and when I called back no one answered, so I was half prepared for this.
Long story short, Matt left the house because Heidi shot out the door and he didn't tell the aide, who was doing laundry, that he was leaving. He turned around on the sidewalk at the side of the house and the wheel came off the concrete, sending him and the chair down over down the hill.
He didn't have his phone, so he used his remote door opener to open and close the door until she noticed and went looking for him.
Several members of the volunteer squad showed up and got him up and back in the chair. The chief finally told me he lost his wife to ALS. He had to leave early. I told him I realized how hard it must be for him to see this and hugged him, and he left in tears. That gutted me.
So, we got him settled and I was off to my hair appointment, where my hair dresser pulled out a bottle of wine and told me to drink
. My friend next door and I then went out for a bite to eat, where she told me about the possibility that she has throat cancer and her other neighbor's cancerous turmor the size of a softball.
Matt seemed unhurt, but his "good" shoulder was in pain (he landed on it), so he was swallowing oxy and under ice all night. I am hoping for a better day.
I know you've all been here. The place where positive thoughts and strength start to give way to despair and agony as we are forced to see the really bad stuff approaching.
Hugs to you all. Thanks for reading my novel.