SLAUGHTER1555
Distinguished member
- Joined
- Jul 12, 2015
- Messages
- 107
- Reason
- CALS
- Diagnosis
- 05/2015
- Country
- US
- State
- Oh
- City
- cincinnati
Hi to everyone its been awhile since i posted on here lots of changes with my PALS. So last time i was here i talked about how the his kids kind of attacked him about life insurance policy. Well time has passed and i am no longer angry but i still dont trust them. Since his diagnosis in May 2015 our finances have went down hill as his disability and small pension is our only income and it only pays the bills which i am so thankful to God for because we dont have to have that.
He has progressed in the disease to the point his speech is not as clear and he does not walk at all now, we transfer to pretty much everything. He can stand here and there so i can pull his close up or for restroom purposes. And guess with the help of the lord i m doing it all on my own smh. We had an aide come but it was only for an hour a day to help bath him but i was still doing as much work as it takes more than one person to lift my 6'4 PALS.
So my crossroad is this it is getting hard to handle him on my own, I do not trust his kids at all and they have small kids and jobs so they cant take care of him like he needs to be taken care of. Because he gets medicare they wont give him and aide all day so i can return to work, I use to be able to leave him and just call but now he chokes on food or drinks so i have to watch him more now. He can no longer be left alone. I am looking into Adult services to maybe take him to waiting on that.
The only option left would be nursing home and that is killing me to even think of that smh how do you know when to make that decision? I was going to have a meeting with his kids and siblings to discuss those options but I kinda dont want them in my business. I mention to my PALS that we need to have something in place I cant continue to do this on my own and btw Im 4'11 smh. I cant imagine having to leave him there but what am i to do. God it hurts so bad I have to walk away most times to go and cry it out because its so hard to look at him. I don see him leaving me anytime soon but just watching him in this state is the worse thing!
I have had so many regrets and thoughts of just walking away but who would take care of him surely not his kids smh and that would not be Godly Jesus would not do that Lord help me. Since we no longer sleep in the same bed its like we are not married smh today i leaned and grabbed him in his chair and he said what was that affection for smh i'm like i give you affection but i spend so much time cooking cleaning emptying lifting helping i don't pay attention i don't show close affection smh but i was like you don't show it either smh this sucks so bad. I guess i better work on showing more affection although that is the last thing on my mind didn't know i wasn't showing it.
Do you think its a good idea to talk to the kids even tho they have no real say so being i m his wife but i would never do a thing like that and i try to keep him involved in everything concerning him and his care i will not railroad him.
Do you think we should get a talking device? he doesn't think he needs one but he does smh men and their stubbornness.
He has progressed in the disease to the point his speech is not as clear and he does not walk at all now, we transfer to pretty much everything. He can stand here and there so i can pull his close up or for restroom purposes. And guess with the help of the lord i m doing it all on my own smh. We had an aide come but it was only for an hour a day to help bath him but i was still doing as much work as it takes more than one person to lift my 6'4 PALS.
So my crossroad is this it is getting hard to handle him on my own, I do not trust his kids at all and they have small kids and jobs so they cant take care of him like he needs to be taken care of. Because he gets medicare they wont give him and aide all day so i can return to work, I use to be able to leave him and just call but now he chokes on food or drinks so i have to watch him more now. He can no longer be left alone. I am looking into Adult services to maybe take him to waiting on that.
The only option left would be nursing home and that is killing me to even think of that smh how do you know when to make that decision? I was going to have a meeting with his kids and siblings to discuss those options but I kinda dont want them in my business. I mention to my PALS that we need to have something in place I cant continue to do this on my own and btw Im 4'11 smh. I cant imagine having to leave him there but what am i to do. God it hurts so bad I have to walk away most times to go and cry it out because its so hard to look at him. I don see him leaving me anytime soon but just watching him in this state is the worse thing!
I have had so many regrets and thoughts of just walking away but who would take care of him surely not his kids smh and that would not be Godly Jesus would not do that Lord help me. Since we no longer sleep in the same bed its like we are not married smh today i leaned and grabbed him in his chair and he said what was that affection for smh i'm like i give you affection but i spend so much time cooking cleaning emptying lifting helping i don't pay attention i don't show close affection smh but i was like you don't show it either smh this sucks so bad. I guess i better work on showing more affection although that is the last thing on my mind didn't know i wasn't showing it.
Do you think its a good idea to talk to the kids even tho they have no real say so being i m his wife but i would never do a thing like that and i try to keep him involved in everything concerning him and his care i will not railroad him.
Do you think we should get a talking device? he doesn't think he needs one but he does smh men and their stubbornness.
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