Taking my husband to see someone in hospice

[brooksea]

This will be the fourth time since diagnosed that he has gone to see a friend near the end.

It was "OK" before, as he wasn't that far along with this disease. But, now he is just a mess over this. He is wishing God would take him instead of her. She has cancer and is in hospice, with only days to live.

She is the wife of the WWII vet that has been so helpful to us. Our son is in FLA and he just turned 11 and is asking about her. He loves her! We all do!

We will go see her tomorrow, if they allow.

Lord have mercy!

 

[Miss]

I hope it goes well. I think my husband would have a hard time with it, too.

 

[Georgia Peach]

So sorry for your pain for someone else near the end. Take him and expect both of you to be a mess afterwards. Some of my biggest regrets in my life were not being about to say goodbye to people I cared about when they were dying.

Of course, this is from a person that can hardly go through a day now without tearing up.

I am a lay assistant at my Lutheran Church and last Sunday while I was doing the Prayers of the Day I got choked up but I finished the prayers. This week we added my husband to the weekly prayers. He had been listed in unspoken prayers and my Stephen's Minister suggested that his name be posted. It is a comfort to hear his name spoken in church.

 

[Ms. Pie]

God's speed to your friend. The end is so sad for us left behind.
Love to you and your Dear husband.

 

[ruthiep]

Thinking about you....hope all goes well or has gone well! Hugs to ya!

Ruth

 

[brooksea]

She passed away this morning. She must have been too much near the end yesterday, as her husband did not call us to tell us it was Ok to come. For the best, all the way around.

She was a sweet lady. She's with God now.

 

[Atsugi]

Wishing you God's comfort.

 

[brooksea]

We went to the memorial service today. We were so honored that this family allowed us to sit on the front pew with them. Not only that, but my husband and I sat right next to our dear old friend who lost his wife, rather than his eldest son sitting next to him. I felt guilty and we protested, but they were all so gracious to us. Instead of flowers I bought a carved "memories angel." They had no funeral, as she wished her body to be donated to Emory. My husband wanted so much to stand up and say something about Ms. Pat, but he can't talk so that anyone would understand him. He used to be a very eloquent speaker and at one time was asked if he was a preacher! I felt so badly for him, as he was making noises like he was trying to say he wanted to say something, but he was on the verge of crying. I wish I could've done it for him, but I would've been balling my eyes out.

In trying to exit the church, DaddyO had to sit in a pew. He started to get emotional and was just so drained. A very kind gentleman neighbor of ours saw his plight and cleared the way for us to get to the receiving line to pay our respects to this wonderful woman's family.

My husband is a total wreck right now. He's just sick that 4 people have gone before him and he doesn't know why he's still here. All the thoughts of what will our son remember when he dies...will he only remember him as being sick...should he donate his body to Emory...what can he do to still make a difference in this life...

He's all "tore" up ( as they say in these parts ).

 

[Georgia Peach]

So sorry for all of your grief. I'm glad that you were both able to attend and what a blessing to your friend that they consider you family.

 

[Ms. Pie]

I'm sorry for your loss CJ. May God comfort you and all the people that love her.