Letter to an Old Friend

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catcaniac

Distinguished member
Joined
Dec 11, 2010
Messages
189
Reason
Lost a loved one
Diagnosis
12/2010
Country
US
State
North Carolina
City
Sneads Ferry
My Dearest Sleep,

I am writing this letter to inquire as to where you may have gone most recently. Are you on a long journey or have you possibly gone on a walkabout? Maybe you are wandering aimlessly and have found yourself lost somewhere in the spirit world. There is no way of knowing as I have not seen the same old friend I knew for years in quite some time. I long for the days that you and I spent countless hours just embracing a world of wonderful dreams in paradise. Drifting away on a cloud together hand in hand we would land by the sea and lay basking in the stars. For many years we have known one another in an intimate way and I presumed that it was a bond that was timeless. But now, I am perplexed. I am concerned. I fear that our friendship has taken a turn for the worse. On this day, as many others, you are difficult to find. It is as if you have disappeared. I look for you in the most familiar places but you are absent. For a moment, I see you or do I? Maybe it is not you but some other form that mocks me and teases me with the memory of you. Sometimes, I think you say, hello. But when I turn to look at you, I realize that I am staring into the face of a stranger. And in an instant, you have vanished. I have begun to fear looking for you as it has become such a melancholy task. No, that isn’t true. Not melancholy, frightful. Who have you become? Someone I fear that I can no longer force myself to seek. I am lost without you yet I cannot allow myself to entertain the prospect that we can once again be together as friends. I no longer know you. When I do, it is no longer a dream with a friend but an odd encounter with a strange bedfellow. I ask you but one favor. Move along. Go your own way. Do not try to visit me time and time again through the eve only to slip away when I finally relent myself to the facade of a friendship past. I do not want to know the new you. The nights are now painful and full of memories of the good times that have gone. You are no longer something pure and good. You have become someone or something that no longer comforts me. Wherever you are and whatever you have become, please come back to me when you, once again are the friend I once lost.

Sincerely,

Sleepless
 
Thanks for sharing. It is quite beautiful and sad!
 
Very well said! You should write a book. I am often up long after everyone else has gone to bed for time to myself, time to reflect and to make the day last as long as possible. This disease puts such a difference perspective on many things.
 
This disease makes many things a distant memory. Many, many things.
 
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