Danijela
Senior member
- Joined
- Dec 3, 2008
- Messages
- 667
- Reason
- PALS
- Diagnosis
- 11/2008
- Country
- UK
- State
- UK
- City
- Bolton
Some of you may know my situation, but here's a quick recap: I am 38, partner 43 diagnosed 2 years ago. We have a lovely 10 month old boy. Laurence is progressing relatively slowly but steadily, but still working full time, driving, walking with a stick, eating and breathing unaided.
As his needs have increased, together with the needs of my son I am finding it harder to fulfil all of my 'roles'. I am ok with 'mother' and 'carer' but feel I am missing out on 'lover' and 'friend' parts.
Life is just so busy and I am the one who is organising most of day to day things. There is a very little adult time where I am not reminded about Laurence's increasing disability (through helping him out with one thing or another). I would like to meet him in town, for a coffee or a drink, once in a while... without having to help him dress, open doors for him, pick up change he has dropped...just meet him on equal terms. I am not saying I am finding it hard on a practial level (I can do all this) but just that I am missing our old life where he could meet me half way. I know the solution is to get some external help and we are working on this. How do you cope (either as a carer or a PAL) with constantly changing roles? Dani
As his needs have increased, together with the needs of my son I am finding it harder to fulfil all of my 'roles'. I am ok with 'mother' and 'carer' but feel I am missing out on 'lover' and 'friend' parts.
Life is just so busy and I am the one who is organising most of day to day things. There is a very little adult time where I am not reminded about Laurence's increasing disability (through helping him out with one thing or another). I would like to meet him in town, for a coffee or a drink, once in a while... without having to help him dress, open doors for him, pick up change he has dropped...just meet him on equal terms. I am not saying I am finding it hard on a practial level (I can do all this) but just that I am missing our old life where he could meet me half way. I know the solution is to get some external help and we are working on this. How do you cope (either as a carer or a PAL) with constantly changing roles? Dani