codyclan
Distinguished member
- Joined
- Jan 26, 2014
- Messages
- 402
- Reason
- Lost a loved one
- Diagnosis
- 02/2014
- Country
- US
- State
- VA
- City
- Round Hill
I don’t post here often but I you all still feel such a community and connection here. It’s been 1 year and 3 1/2 months since we lost Ted. I was thinking this morning that I used to mark my babies’ ages in months but eventually we just say their ages in years. Is it the same with marking a loved one’s passing.
Anyway, I finally got myself to clean out his things. I did it in stages, shoes, then suits and closet. I was emotionally fine with all of those things. I waited and waited on the dresser and finally did it this week and while I was fine doing it—I have been tearful and emotional ever since.
I wanted the dresser done because tomorrow I leave for the Camino in Spain. For those who don’t know, it is a 500 mile pilgrimage across Northern Spain. I plan to average 15 miles a day and hope to do it in 33 days. I have been training since the fall, but really amped it up this spring. I have loved the training and have felt strong till this week, I decided I wanted his dresser cleaned out before I left so when I come home it will be done. But truly I am now nervous and weepy about all of it and I haven’t felt like this in months — stupid grief. The girls and he used to have a special rocks, so I am taking one of those with me as the tradition of the Camino is to leave a rock at the iron cross to symbolize leaving your burdens and worries.
Let’s hope I can do it—and I don’t cry the whole flipping way. Wish me luck (especially since my Spanish is extremely limited!). Buen Camino!
Tracy
Anyway, I finally got myself to clean out his things. I did it in stages, shoes, then suits and closet. I was emotionally fine with all of those things. I waited and waited on the dresser and finally did it this week and while I was fine doing it—I have been tearful and emotional ever since.
I wanted the dresser done because tomorrow I leave for the Camino in Spain. For those who don’t know, it is a 500 mile pilgrimage across Northern Spain. I plan to average 15 miles a day and hope to do it in 33 days. I have been training since the fall, but really amped it up this spring. I have loved the training and have felt strong till this week, I decided I wanted his dresser cleaned out before I left so when I come home it will be done. But truly I am now nervous and weepy about all of it and I haven’t felt like this in months — stupid grief. The girls and he used to have a special rocks, so I am taking one of those with me as the tradition of the Camino is to leave a rock at the iron cross to symbolize leaving your burdens and worries.
Let’s hope I can do it—and I don’t cry the whole flipping way. Wish me luck (especially since my Spanish is extremely limited!). Buen Camino!
Tracy