I understand Cee. I fear life after.
Nuts, agree on sometimes resting making it worse. I do know that at first I hated that I was no longer sleeping in the same bed as Brian, and now I still miss him but bed is my little refuge. A refuge where I worry about something going wrong downstairs but still a refuge. We live reasonably well with the constant, nagging presence of ALS But live with it we do.
We actually scheduled clinic to March 1 and Brian wants to talk more about what they can do for him at the end. He has pretty well scraped the Dignitas plan. I am glad because much as I would roll with it I hate it on a couple levels. I picture us in a country we have never even visited surrounded by people who don’t speak our language and Brian leaving this world and I never even get ashes because of regulations on transporting those. I picture being alone with all of same and a 16 Hour plane trip alone to come into my house with no Brian. We live a few miles from where we were born and the love of my little foe would leave the world THAT way? Yikes.