WendyWooG
Senior member
- Joined
- Jan 10, 2016
- Messages
- 519
- Reason
- PALS
- Diagnosis
- 07/2016
- Country
- Uk
- State
- Hertfordshire
- City
- Stevenage
A recent post in the calls section has made me re evaluate my attitude to things.
Who we were as a person has a big impact on how we deal with the monster and how hard/ easy we make things for our family cals friends as things progress.
I was always a doer an organiser a busy person, someone that others came to for help rather than needing help. The inability to control my surroundings has been the most difficult part of my adjustment.
As my daughter and husband have taken over the housework there have been a few disagreements on what is ok and what is not as far as the cleaning goes, I thought I had eased up on my normally neat freak tendencies and was being more relaxed about things. Apparently not! I didn't want to cause them hassle but was getting itsy and ratty because the house hadn't had its sprint deep clean and I was noticing more and more bits wrong. I got my pension finally! So I decided to pay for a professional cleaners to come in and blitz the house and ironing so I could relax and not make my cals feel bad.
Well I got a huge reality check, I was merrily telling the cleaners how much it had built up and how it was going to take a bit to get everything up to scratch. They actually stared at me gobsmacked.....
They felt there wasn't that much to do and the house was really clean. They are a professional cleaning company you have to accept the opinion of the experts. The only bit that had gotten bad was the oven.
So I have come to the realisation that I am an OCD clean freak my cals are normal and I need to let go.
I was causing problems and I didn't realise how demoralising my family felt when all their work wasn't good enough for unreasonable me. The problem had nothing to do with als itself or ftd which I don't have thankfully, and everything to do with who I am as a person. It's not been nice for me to accept this side of my personality and it's effects on others.
I am keeping the cleaners to reduce the load on my family, and my daughter has gleefully told me she will remind me any time I backslide. We are all human we are all falliable and sometimes we are all wrong.
I have just realised this is a bit of a mad ramble, but it has felt good to get it out.
Wendy
Who we were as a person has a big impact on how we deal with the monster and how hard/ easy we make things for our family cals friends as things progress.
I was always a doer an organiser a busy person, someone that others came to for help rather than needing help. The inability to control my surroundings has been the most difficult part of my adjustment.
As my daughter and husband have taken over the housework there have been a few disagreements on what is ok and what is not as far as the cleaning goes, I thought I had eased up on my normally neat freak tendencies and was being more relaxed about things. Apparently not! I didn't want to cause them hassle but was getting itsy and ratty because the house hadn't had its sprint deep clean and I was noticing more and more bits wrong. I got my pension finally! So I decided to pay for a professional cleaners to come in and blitz the house and ironing so I could relax and not make my cals feel bad.
Well I got a huge reality check, I was merrily telling the cleaners how much it had built up and how it was going to take a bit to get everything up to scratch. They actually stared at me gobsmacked.....
They felt there wasn't that much to do and the house was really clean. They are a professional cleaning company you have to accept the opinion of the experts. The only bit that had gotten bad was the oven.
So I have come to the realisation that I am an OCD clean freak my cals are normal and I need to let go.
I was causing problems and I didn't realise how demoralising my family felt when all their work wasn't good enough for unreasonable me. The problem had nothing to do with als itself or ftd which I don't have thankfully, and everything to do with who I am as a person. It's not been nice for me to accept this side of my personality and it's effects on others.
I am keeping the cleaners to reduce the load on my family, and my daughter has gleefully told me she will remind me any time I backslide. We are all human we are all falliable and sometimes we are all wrong.
I have just realised this is a bit of a mad ramble, but it has felt good to get it out.
Wendy