Thread: My Mom
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Old 03-08-2004, 11:53 PM #4 (permalink)
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TBear TBear is offline
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Join Date: 2003
City: Uxpatch
State: ON
Country: CA
Interest: My wife lost her battle with ALS in 2001
Posts: 433
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TBear TBear is offline
Member
TBear's Avatar
Join Date: 2003
City: Uxpatch
State: ON
Country: CA
Interest: My wife lost her battle with ALS in 2001
Posts: 433
TBear is an unknown quantity at this point
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Hi Carol:
I'd really like to be finished with winter right now but I still have some work that depends on the weather staying cold. In the back of my mind I am secretly pining away to get back up to my cottage.
Yes, I know exactly how you are feeling. I was married for 24 years... but we met 12 years earlier so I'd been with her for 36 of her 50 years! I could read her mind (for as much as any man can understand what is on a woman's mind). The most difficult part was trying to remember that I was the husband and not the nurse. She already had enough clinical people around her and she needed real people with her!
The subtle changes and modifications to our lives, I think, moderate us philosophically so yep I think we all greived a little bit each day, but tried to hold onto any glimmer of hope. Over all, those of us who were intimately involved with her care fared much better than those who were close to my wife but couldn't or didn't "get in the game". After 3 years they are still suffering and wonder how I and my girls can possibly be coping with the loss. I'm more patient, less confrontational, maybe a bit stoic... definitly sarcastic ( but I didn't develop that from being a caregiver).
25 years of marriage is a major accomplishment these days when so many people bail out on each other when the going gets tough. You are a true warrior and probably a certified nutcase... congratulations! I'm still waiting for the shower story... but the foot warming is starting to catch everybody's interest... no wonder Henry is hanging in there!
More later... I want to get email off to a couple of my kids about this fitness thing in Montreal later on in the month.

CHeers
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