Come For Tea

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Heck, Helen let's go to IHOP :)
 
I Love IHOP!

Not sure what to do about boy #1 here... he's been really surly, and has gone off his meds for his moods.... but they should be more stable by now, and if anything, he's worse! I can't exactly force meds down a 14 year old's throat, and I understand that he just doesn't like to take the meds (who does?)... BUT WOW! Aly saw a bit of it when she was over... he's either really wonderful, or just plain nasty at times. He was on a generic of Zoloft and after I found out that he hadn't taken his meds for over 5 days, I decided to let him stay off for a while, but it's just not working! What to do? His next appt isn't for a few weeks, but he's flipped out at his Dad (in some cases rightly so, but not to the extreme), and he just flilpped out over the dog barking like a fruitcake. Teenagers...
 
I have a friend that spends some time at IHOP. They are located in Kansas City, KS.. There it stands for
Int'l house of prayer. They have prayer warriors 24/7. For over 10 years, every day, all day, every night
all night, 24/7, someone is praying at that gathering. Google it if you would like to see it.

Helen, here is the story. My youngest son is bi-polar. Good looking blue eyed blond boy. (now 35 with his
MBA) We all are temper mental. Finding the norm is the what we work towards. At fourteen I could still
handle my son, physically. I/we never came to a fist fight. Never. Intense fellowship, quite often. I
could never let him win those battles, or I would have lost the war.

We both don't have the time or space here to include all the different set of circumstances. Some here
on the forum, simply have a rebellious child. Different from BP. Hello, what I am able to finish saying
here. James Dobson (focus on the family) has a good book out called tough love.
If not reading the book, remember the title. You will have to exercise tough love. Be consistent.

You and I could both have been born at night. But, it was not last night. :) So, we both know we
all make mistakes. I want you to be encouraged. It will get worse before it gets better.
Don't make excuses for his behavior, keep him accountable as would a judge. Because that is who
he will deal with next.

Have your deal breakers and stick to them. My son has been on and off his medication for many years.
Right now, he takes no prescriptions. He gets his rest and exercises. He has sat down at his banquet
of consequences. You cannot unscramble eggs. He has paid a high price for his low living. (poor choices)

Maybe I should have PM'd you, however, I know others are going through the same kind of troubles.
The only person in the world with all their problems behind them, is a bus driver.
My son still struggles with flair up's. Remember, struggling just means you are still doing it. :)

Sorry for going long, my prayers go out to you, and may God be with you.
 
Had the surgery yesterday. They numbed me up and gave me funny gas. I definately enjoyed the gas... however, it still hurt having the teeth taken out. The dentist said I was as numb as I could be, so i would just have to deal with it. Not gonna lie, it was a little traumatic. Today my mouth feels fairly decent, but my face hurts. Feels like my sinuses hurt and my eyes hurt. Sort of odd.
Here is some good news. I havent smoked a cig since 4:30 yesterday afternoon. Im not supposed to smoke because of my teeth, so I figured id take advantage of that and try to quit. Need the money for Christmas gifts.

Helen and Aly- I got my package yesterday. Thank you sooo much! I loved it all, and it came just in time. I was really nervous about having the surgery yesterday and having some anxiety issues. The package came about a half hour before I had to leave. Helped to calm me. Im curious to see what those pineapple thingys are like- have to wait another day or so before i can eat hard food.

Susan and Sharon- I got your things in the mail yesterday as well. How do I properly thank you? You ladies mean so very much to me. So much so that I cannot find the words to express how much you all mean to me. I promise to pay it forward. Promise.
Oh, Susan, thanks for the Halloween package as well! Such fun!
 
Thanks Jim, you're right that I can't let him win the important issues. One of the problems is his father is worse than he is, and then they both act like 12 year olds. Actually my 12 year old acts better. He's a really smart kid, and I know he'll get through this phase, but I'm also concerned that high school (he's a freshman and it's a big school) peers may be part of the problem, but his grades are ok, and he doesn't say anything. But that's part of the problem, he doesn't SAY anything good or bad about his days. I know I've mentioned this before, but he has a diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome, and he was very extreme when he was little. But I was bigger than him then and could step in and control him. He isn't violent with anyone... yet. I'm concerned that it may come to that with his little brother or his father at some point. I just keep telling him that if it's his choice to not take the meds, then HE has to be responsible for his anger management, and lashing out verbally is NOT acceptable. We'll see what happens. I'll take a look at that book as well, thanks for your note. Helen
 
Liz, so sorry that you ended up having to have oral surgery, that really sucks. You've had quite a time of it in the last couple of weeks, and I'm hoping that things will turn around for you as well. In retrospect, it was a good thing that you couldn't come out here as you would have been miserable instead of enjoying yourself, and now you still have a good trip in your future to look forward to! And you better plan on staying at least a few days with me! I won't hog you the whole trip, I know you have a friend in Chelmsford as well.

I'm glad you got our package right when it helped the most. Those pineapple treats were good, I had to hide that one package as everyone ate the other 2! Once I get caught up on my work, I'll go through some of my photos and post a few for all to see. It really stunk that 2 days it rained (we shopped), then it had the Nor'easter and snow, and then no power and COLD for 2 more days. At least in between we got down to the Cape and drove around. Next time we'll get to Nantucket, but it was too cold and long a trip for one day. And we still have a tree down on one half of my driveway, no one from the town will touch it, as it's near power lines, and the power company won't touch it 'till everyone is back with power. So we juggle the cars and complain, but we're REALLY glad that we have our power, and it's just a tree! :)

I don't think Aly is even home yet, I think she'll be home in about 2 hours if my figuring is correct. Her plane should have landed by now, and then I think she said it was 2 hours to home from the airport. She left Friday morning Boston time, and will get home on Sunday New Zealand time I think. Long trip....

So what's everyone up to today? The Scouting for Food is going on today, anyone want to donate a can or box o' food? Virtually of course. Also, we're celebrating Halloween tonight in town, so if you haven't had enough of the candy, come on over and get some more.
 
Helen my husband has been on Zoloft for a few years. He really isn't the typical person who takes it for straight depression--it is more for negative mood or outlook on life since he got the CIDP. He does not like taking it so on two occasions he has attempted to wean himself off. I can tell the difference in 48 hours. He gets super negative and almost angry about everything. I can actually see his lips starting to turn down into a sort of ugly nasty sneer. It is very pronounced the way his mood turns bad and he gets irritable. I have insisted each time that he goes back on the Zoloft. I figure it is a biochemical thing in his body--just not enough seratonin to keep him level. I can tell you I wouldn't last long living with him without the Zoloft. Luckily he listens to me and stays on it. He says he can feel the black cloud moving in on him without it.
Laurel
 
Hello my friends,
Liz, try a bag of frozen peas on the sore spots. It will take a few days but with the infection gone you'll feel loads better. If your bleeding try a teabag soaked in cool water. The tannic acid stops the bleeding.
Helen, It must be in the air. Nina shut the bedroom door in my face yesterday. Her door is now in the garage. Hormonal pre teen? You bet. We are now in the meanest parents in the world, your ruining my life club. Bill and I will get our official cards soon Hahahaha. like I care.
I feel for you too. 14 is not easy in the best circumstances. Just the peer pressure is over the top.
 
Laurel, you pinpointed it exactly... I can always tell the day after he stopped, but I hoped by now that black cloud would have lifted a bit. It's that anger that bothers me, how can he feel better feeling that way? But he won't talk about it.

Susan, you are too funny! Did you really take the door off and put it in the garage? Love it. If you can survive 14 then 17 won't be so bad I think...
 
Off the hinges and gone in a flash
 
Good for you Susan! You get the best parent award. That took guts and a tremendous amount of love. Stopped her from doing that again. Helen, Aspergers Syndrome is a tough one. I have no advice other than prayer. I can do that and will.
 
He's actually been doing very well, but off his meds... I really see it. He's better in public than at home, so I'm hoping he's better at school. Life at home is not the best right now, with the house on the market and the constant reminder of my increasing disabilities... not to mention his lunatic father, who acts more like a kid than my kids do. More drama with his dad around, I really want to move forward for all our sakes, and SELL this gorgeous old house (which has lots of heat now!) (and no fleas)

Thanks Ladies, I appreciate it! Love you all!
 
Well girls, talking about a serious subject, I must say you did have me smiling. Ok, laughing. I think
I told you all that Eddie's son has Asperger's Syndrome. He is twenty two years young. He does really
well with it though.
His deal is stomping. When Eric is upset he stomps. Last episode was some one in the house ate his
four meat hot pockets. He didn't yell, he just stomped off. I went to Wal-mart and bought him a bunch
of them.

Last week when I was cleaning out the refrigerator down stairs, I looked inside and there were some
hot pockets. I just laughed. Anyway, Mark Twain said; "When they turn 13, put them in a barrel and
feed them through the knot hole. when they turn 16, plug the knot hole. :)
Susan, I had a picture in my mind of the door ordeal. Laurel, I can see his lip.

Liz, so glad you are past the fear of the dentist. Admit you want to quit smoking, and you will. I just told myself, if you want to, you will. If you don't really want to, don't. Then I did. Watch people smoke and cough. Stand outside in freezing weather. Look at them at the cash register use there spare change just to buy smokes. I am not making fun, I have just been there, done that. Hope it works for you. Emotion won't change anything. Action will.

Our lives are pretty comical amidst the dark clouds. Hope everyone is home safe and sound.

Jim
 
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.Hey all,

Wished I had heat! But I have been hunkered down under the covers with my electric matress pad on high! Today was the first day that was able to lift my head without wanting to get sick. Great diet lose 12 lbs in 6 days. I also have been going through withdrawal. Can't take the pills no meds damn this bites. And then having someone pull the covers off and 2 min later needing them back. My life SUCKS!

Diane, I want some good news by tomorrow!

Aly, hope your home and being pampered.

Helen, enjoyed your travels.

Liz, glad the teeth are mending and thanks for the offer. I'm going to stay here until I know it's time to move on.

Susan, we didn't have the problems with our girls slamming doors but my oldest boy had a problem with turning that racket they called music from the late 80's. I learned which circuit breaker was for his room real quick!

Oh, I have an open door policy in my home. Only doors are front, back and bathrooms.

Enjoy the rest of the weekend

My Love to All,

Kimberly
 
Hi all, just a short note to say I am home safely and just had a lovely shower. I feel great but my legs are tree trunks. The joys of long haul flights. Had a great flight across the Pacific. Got my upgrade at the last minute, to Premium economy ,so the extra leg room was great. It was upstairs on the Jumbo, so I just waited to disembark last so I could get my bags carried down the stairs.
Susan, I gave the flashing pumpkin to Sam , he really loked it and Helen he is munching on the candy corn as we speak.
Liz, glad you liked the parcel from Susan, Helen and I.......Those pineapple lumps are my favourite, but they are VERY chewy so take care.
I will say farewell as I have some eager family to coffee with.
 
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